Tuesday 23 September 2008

the spirit of london-the spirit of you


I've been wanting to write this post since then end of the Olympics which illustrates that though I am a life coach I still carry ideas around with me without always executing them-it's so very irritating.

Anyway, the point is still valid though not quite so topical as it was. Despite the political angle of the Beijing Olympics throwing a definite shadow over the occasion, it was for little GB, a fabulous, memorable success for individuals, team and country. It was just what we needed-a fortifying tonic, a potent injection of hope and positivity and great ray of sunshine casting light over a country that feels as if it has lost much of what we believed was GREAT about it. For three weeks we felt pride, unity and a just a little bit great again. That is the power of sport, of personal endeavour and team spirit, of ambition and achievement and sheer will to succeed whatever the set backs and limited resources.

God, it was emotional, inspiring and addictive -every day tuning in to hear the stories behind the success and watch as we won medal after medal. I swear that for those three weeks, the majority of Great Britain felt happy-millions were affected and influenced by it and that is why the government must put more money into sport because of what it can do for the country. Proof too, that the political issues can be pushed aside while we concentrate on what is magical about life -and despite our world troubles, we see countries come together, compete against each other and respect and congratulate each other. Hopeful, heartwarming and harmonious in spirit. Sport is a great, great leveller and religion, sadly is the separator.

China spent £22 billion on a superlative extravaganza-and London has to follow that. We have a budget of £9.3 billion and so, clearly it's going to be a vey different kind of games. And so it should be. We are a very different country and culture with our own history and individual identity and quirks and the job of hosting the games to the world will I hope, prompt us to look within and re-assess just what we have to offer, who we are, where we came from and what we feel represents and reflects who we are at the core. It could be a very significant exercise for us. Just what will the Olympic Journey reveal and how may it affect and change us a nation?

It has the same parallel as anyone getting married. Each person is an individual, with their own story and personality and there is no need to live up to others expectations, do what is expected or please or impress anyone.

No matter what the budget, you just need to do your thing and be proud of it. You alone are great, beautiful and good enough. You don't need gimmicks or show stopping accessories-the best that you can do is be honest and true to yourself and bring all that you truly are to your wedding day. There is no need to be perfect-like China thought they needed to be when they swapped a less cute little girl who sang the opening ceremony song for a more aesthetically pleasing one who mimed along to the original little girl. Despite all they spent and all the effort they put in-right there they got it wrong. They thought they needed to present something perfect when all they needed to do was give us what was real.

The London Olympics will do what it can with the money that they have and deliver something that represents the changing face of Great Britain and you, as you face your own, major life event can enjoy looking within yourself and put together a wedding that is quintessentially you.

And, if you aren't sure where to start or how to go about it, that's why I'm here!

Thursday 11 September 2008

A Very Authentic Wedding

On 21st october 2000 -Gary and I got married at Portmeirion in North Wales-it was, as anyone who has visited visited my website will know-the most fantastic, unforgettable, unique day. Portmeirion alone is a special place. It's where the cult 60's series The Prisoner was filmed and it stands amidst mountains on a stunning estuary. It's a fairytale village made up of buildings brought from all over the world-buildings and pieces of architecture that would otherwise have been demolished, brought to this Welsh beauty spot to create something magical.




We hadn't been back there since our wedding day and last week we visited with Gary's parents and Louie, our 4 year old. It's a strange feeling returning to the place where you were married. I didn't expect such a strong reaction. I felt elated-uplifted and goose-bumpy as the second most profound, memorable day of my life-(superceded only by the day that Louie arrived)came flooding back into my heart and my mind.

The greatest thing of all was the fact that we are still married and despite all that we have been through, we love each other completely -perhaps for me-more openly and confidently than ever . Gary agreed that it was moving, being there, with our son, reliving the memory and feeling that our day had been real. We realised that it was what we had thought it was-a genuine desire on both our parts to be married to each other.

I always say that I felt proud on our wedding day, a definite sense of achievement during the ceremony especially and still I feel that. The power of those wedding vows cannot be underestimated. If you let them in, they sit within you and influence you forever I think. Perhaps, at times dormant but always there ready to resurface when you most need them, there to prick your conscience when you forget to honour them.

It's a trip to go back there-to that place where married life took it's first ever steps and to see how far you have come. It just sealed my belief that the act of getting married is a most worthwhile one. Even today with all the negative press that it receives, where some struggle to find it's meaning and point in our contemporary world-I continue to promote and champion it as something that can be believed in and with the right attitude it can have the most positive impact on your experience of life. Honestly, I'm surrounded by too much proof of that, to think any differently.

I suppose too, that this little story just reinforces what I always say: Get married and have your wedding in a venue that you LOVE, somewhere that you feel somehow connected or that has a special place in your heart because it adds to your enjoyment of the day and the depth and significance of the memory that you are left with.

The more that you can connect with your wedding day the better-it all makes it harder to walk away from in the future and realistically, there will be times when you need to draw on that.

Tuesday 9 September 2008

It's good to TAWC!



















Me and my friend Katie from Ethical Weddings and my newer friend Lou, an ethical stylist are running a new support group for brides called 'tawc'-The Authentic Wedding Connection.That's Katie on the left with the hat and Lou's looking cute in green. We wanted to create a real life community for like minded brides to get together and share their wedding journey experience because we all know how lonely it can be when it gets a bit tough and there are many, many brides who just don't feel like they can relate to the more conventional online wedding forums.

So tawc is for those who want a more personal experience of getting married and planning their wedding. One that honours their values and is honestly aligned with who they are as people rather than one that ticks all the boxes of a big budget extravaganza. Of course, our ethical girls will be showing how easy it is to be just a little bit greener,more thoughtful and conscious of the community and the environment and I will be there to coach and support on the emotional issues of getting married.

We invite brides to come and share their stories, their ups and downs and swap their ideas and we will also ask different suppliers and services to come in and share their knowledge and expertise. All in all it will be relaxed, friendly and fun and a special little sanctuary for brides to be really upront and honest about what they are experiencing.

The first meeting is on Monday 15th September in Brighton and it's FREE! We'll hold a meeting once a month and eventually we hope to have tawc pods all over the country. If you fancy it you can sign up here or contact me or if you aren't local to Brighton but are interested in the idea call me for a chat about it. The brides revolution starts here!